Sarah and I just celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. Not exactly a major milestone or anything, but we’re three kids into this thing and still extremely happy (tired…but happy). We also find ourselves in a season where we seem to have a bunch of younger people in our lives getting married, engaged, or becoming Instagram-official…love is in the air, I guess. And because of that, I find myself talking to a lot of guys asking the same question: how do you have an awesome marriage? Here are three things that have kept Sarah and I going through even the toughest seasons of our marriage…
Then it happened - my wife delivered our third child, I looked down as the doctor cradled the gooey infant in her arms, and I blurted out "it's a girl." I was wrecked!!! I knew instantaneously that there is something wildly different about a daughter to the heart of a father. Don't get me wrong: I love my boys more than anything, but that little girl has melted my heart in a way I never thought possible. From the moment she entered my life, she has been slowly destroying me in the best ways possible.
I have known for years that I needed to get around to shining my favorite boots before they were worn and dried out beyond repair, but didn't have the supplies and was afraid of ruining the most expensive shoes I own. As it turns out, the process was remarkably simple, required a very minimal investment, and the boots look far better than I thought a simple shining would accomplish. More than that, I found it to be an incredibly gratifying and therapeutic process. It forces you to slow down, focus, and connect with generations of men long past that engaged in this task on a regular basis simply because they were men and that was something men did. I plan to shine my boots regularly now, just because it brings me joy. Alright, enough shoe philosophy (sholosophy?), here's how to shine your boots!
Here is what I have come to believe: that is total horse-crap! For just about anyone in just about any situation, the "I could never do that because..." fallacy is total garbage. It's a lie your brain (and I would argue, the devil) tells you to protect you from the discomfort associated with change. Even if you're not happy with the status quo, change ALWAYS brings unpleasantness of some form, and so our brains work to keep us stuck where we are because it's familiar and comfortable. How many dudes live quiet lives of desperation because there is some dream in their mind that they have convinced themselves could never be a reality?